Preamble: If you want to enjoy this to its fair value, remember that once you have read the test by giving en face de chaque réponse le verdict auquel elle correspond. Et de faire de même avec "A poil ou pas à poil", parce que si aucun d'entre vous ne m'a demandé qui était Cerrone, je trouve ça louche (aussi louche que votre absence de remarques sur les tatouages de Rob Halford). Que voulez-vous, je ne suis pas comme ça, je ne balance pas de l'humour prémâché.
100% des deux lectrices qui ont effectué le test "A poil ou pas à poil, quelle métalleuse êtes-vous ? Complained to the readers' letters. To repair this mistake, "Enchantment and Charcuterie ", the blog of modern women today, offers a test of the e ty to catch up on a theme by no means stupid and without any sail on a wave of non-culture putassière.
In collaboration with "lol mdr mag cromeugnon F AB + 18-25 well in their string, our second test of the summer :
What Vampire Twilite (™) is your secret lover?
(It goes without saying that the formal address displayed thereafter is only a form of deference designed to make you feel like a woman, with a capital F and dignity tiny caused by the avalanche on hormonal Twilite (™), a woman ready for a relationship for a young vampire hot and moist, but actually, we remain friends too lol, ok?) - the first appointment:
d. You kiss.
a. You lie.
b. You prepare your bomb lacrymo.
c. You prepare the Vaseline.
- you expect from your secret lover that epilating:
b. as Celimbacca. You love that your hero is buried in this mass hirsute.
c. eyebrows. You just can not brush these shithouse that is worn jauntily.
d. fully, the jojoba wax enriched butter Maite, wild perfume of the islands Guatemala.
a. cheeks leaving just a tuft-shaped heart, and calves in the form of your name.
- Your worst enemy (e) is: a.
time passes and makes the roses wilt.
b. your mother, that prohibits you from biting the silverware to go kill your teacher of Business Law (views his armpits, you're sure it's a werewolf).
c. your banker, who does not understand that you need this loan to buy shoes to match your new hat.
d. cellulitis of the knee.
- Au lit, vous êtes plutôt :
a. chouette
b. tigresse
c. cochonne
d. marmotte
- A la plage, vous mangez :
a. des fruits de mer pêchés à la main. Autant dire que vous allez garder la ligne.
b. le repas de la famille à côté de vous. Z'avaient qu'à pas se baigner tous en même temps.
c. deux heures avant de vous baigner. Et grâce à la crème solaire sur vos doigts, c'est sandwich au sable.
d. sévère, malgré la double couche de crème solaire indice 95+.
- Vous partez en week-end :
c. à Prague. Un peu moyen au niveau des vampires, mais quand même en Europe de l'Est.
a. avec les stars, chaque fois que vous lisez Closer.
b. à l'improviste. Vous suivez votre amoureux qui refuse de vous révéler votre destination, même une fois que vous êtes entrés dans le camping.
d.à Rouen. Comme ça vous pouvez prendre le train avec Charlotte, la perdante de Secret Story. (véridique)
Verdict
You have a majority of a:
In your head, you still fourteen, and your world is pink, filled with butterflies and flowers that run in fields. You expect your lover to take you to Tahiti to live on a beautiful beach, in a log cabin he has built with his own chest with coconut. Here you sustain love, fresh water and desalinated ecologically wild pig killed kawai with kindness by your Romeo. Finally, since the latter remains a Vampire Twilite (™) and the sun in Tahiti is therefore, he selflessly serve as a reference point for pilots of light nice seat airliners ejection crashing on Faaa politely. Your secret lover
Twilite (™) is ... Edward (©), the friendly vampire Twilite (™) certainly dark and pragmatic, but above all infinitely romantic thanks to his years with Baudelaire, Jane Austen and Helene Segara. Lol!
You have a majority of b:
In your head, you still fourteen, and you like older men (those with a scooter) and mysterious (mono- Welcome facial expression). you are a fragile woman cleverly concealed beneath a veneer of social rebellion surly (Jena Lee as "the Lolita Gothic metal RnB, mixing rock, metal and traditional R & B" * ). You are lost without the scent of male virility which emanates from the fur of your lover and you can feel secure in this wild and bestial. You like to think that men (and vampires) are subtle creatures, sensitive and robust to both (a bit like an anvil crystal or a panzer cardboard), and you want to be the only read into it ("I'm hungry," "I thirst", "Woman, I wish copulate", etc..) while your friends can only see this facade that seems to declare "My last visit to
Twilite (™) is ... Edward (©), the mysterious Vampire Twilite (™) certainly romantic and pragmatic, but above all infinitely dark with his immortality (he saw the atrocities of fashion dress of the 90s, that you mark a man for ever). When he looks at you, you, through the pages of the book and his eyebrows from another planet, his fiery eyes make you melt like ice cream too ripe. PTDR!
You have a majority in c:
In your head, you still fourteen, and you know you're smarter than 99% of humanity. Soon you chalent these kids who go over with you, these young idealists who say "lol" in their sentences when a simple "lol" would suffice. You need a man rooted in the reality of the real life, a man (or vampire) who has seen and experienced much, and who withdrew the wisdom of elephants, unending knowledge about women and shoes coordinations-handbag and a loft of 800m ² in the sixteenth (one man has seen and experienced much that he was a Swiss banker in 44) to get a better perspective on life and entelechy profound superego. You expect him to like a timetable "Kant and Heidegger in comics," you wake up every morning to the sound of an aphorism disarming ("Being nice is good," "You're only a reflection of your shadow if you're lying to yourself," "It will buy bread way back ", etc..). Your secret lover
Twilite (™) is ... Edward (©), the wise Vampire Twilite (™) certainly dark and romantic, but also infinitely pragmatic fraction to its long experience of things: two centuries of forgetting leave croquettes chat going on holiday Beziers, that you forge a man. Lol!
You have a majority of d:
In your head, you still fourteen, and even if you still believe in Prince Charming, you refuse to look the other way: Edward is really too early for you. So you made yours the maxim of Socrates, "The hemlock is too sauced. You've decided to live fully as death by becoming LoLiGoth philosophical ideal. Want to stay beautiful and pure until the Grim Reaper, and your ideal man who will embrace your lifestyle more than your body and its most shameful. The despair of his vampiric condition had locked forever love of his heart in the grave of his memories, ** but your morbid elegance has awaken in him the love and courteous Dead Poets prude. Yet you're complicit, and you laugh when it steals your panties black lace to wear (or for resale at exorbitant prices on eBay.jp if they have already served). Your secret lover
Twilite (™) is ... Edward , your best friend is gay gothic beside you in the auditorium of steel. A romantic guy (he loves black and hair flying in bad wind), pragmatic (it took steel to be able to sink your body into pure silver when you're committed suicide together) and Tene ; many (it does not become a hairdresser, "that is mysterious to a gay ...). ROTFLMAO!
* (sic) would like Riton. I heard it word for word on TV. To your culture, I feel obliged to provide you a link to this piece rock-metal-RnB . I'll let you also enjoy the side "Lolita" from his mug of breaded fish (they had to say that "Lolita" meant "full of lolitude).
** It's beautiful, eh? It deserves to be on the Goble-xXx-xXx PetiteCoccinelleNoireAPointsNoirs, do not you think?
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